New tax brackets

List of the day for Nov. 6, 2023

Look at this federal government monster, eating your money. JK. It’s a little piggy eatin’ some metal.

Are you prepared for Tax Season? It’s right around the corner, according to an ad I saw online. Pop-up ads are always accurate.

The pop-up sent me into a panic; so, I researched taxes—when it happens as well as something called “new tax brackets.” This means you pay more or less tax based on some significant life characteristic or factor. I’m only guessing.

TAX BRACKETS 2023-2024

• Listens to James Taylor

• Drives an Eddie Bauer Ford Bronco

• Circle K sommelier

• Jewel-Osco rewards member

• Instagram famous (also applies to Reddit and PornHub)

• Poet-in-residence

• “My favorite show is ‘Dog the Bounty Hunter’…still”

• “I have Dish Network”

• Sociology professor (tenured)

• Avid reader of large-print softcore romance

• Played second stage at OzzFest 2003

• Meals usually end with, “If you don’t like Hamburger Helper, you can cooke something else, Dale!”

• Budding content creator (new video dropping Friday)

• The athelete who coulda went pro if it weren’t for their “goddamn knee”

• Clown school grad

• Got into basketball cards during the pandemic

• Purveyor of physical media